Lost

And here I stand again!!!
Lost with shattered thoughts..
Lost in the desert of life, blinded by the salty water in my eyes..
Lost in the dillisions of sight, trying to recognize my vagued selfhood..
Lost in the ashes of time, failing to distinguish between right and wrong..
Lost in the storm of realities, trying to understand my perplexed personality..
And again, here I am!!
Here I stand again.. lost having a fogged identity!!!

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Reverberation of my words..

Phew… Finally am back :)

Or at least am trying to… Trying to do what I didn’t in last approximately two years, Trying to do what I’ve been planning from almost an year, Trying to do what i once genuinely enjoyed doing, And undoubtedly, trying to do for what I now doubt myself to be able to do (:

Yes, it’s nothing but my getting back to blogging. But is it really a blogging or something other than mere ‘composing a cyber diary’? Something more than what it seem to be? Well, I don’t really know about public’s opinion for this regard, but for me it certainly IS a lot more than that..It leads me to a journey of self-discovery, a pathway to self-exploration. It gives me energy to win a fight with my demons which make me aware of their existence every now and then. It lets me remove the tag of ‘fogged’ from my identity.. And last, but by no means least, it guides me to clarify what appears to be vague…

If it’s that special and significant in my life, then what’s clicking your mind must be a question that what made me vanish this task from my life? And for this, I don’t really have an answer. I just don’t know. All I know is that few reasons required me be quiet on the turmoils of life and observe the trends of life like a hard rock, or perhaps a stone lol..

And then, this belief of my mine eventually created a distance between me and words. And as they say, a wall when built is hard to climb. So was the case at my side. Many feelings kept on engulfing me not letting go and climb the wall and peek at the other side of myself.

I still haven’t yet reached to a conclusion to declare that it was fear which stopped me..Fear of not being able to climb, fear of losing command on words, fear of forgetting the tricks I once used to play with words, or JUST the fear of not being able to be heard in odyssey of noises (:

And now, when I’ve finally started to beat and win over this fear, I just am having a light of hope to be able to stand tall at the end of season. I just am having a hidden, suppressed desire to overcome the balustrade caused by my demons, and end up being triumphant in the conduit of self-exploration.. (:

Oh and by the way, Did i forgot to mention that I need prayers from all of you? (: